Changes

So...how am I doing? I am actually okay!Its far better than miserable and even though I cant say I'm happy as of yet, Okay is a very positive place for me. I am truly single now. After my last interaction with Trish, I've realized that it is an end and I am ready for a new beginning.

I am and forever will have great memories of her. Even though there was plenty of heartache and pain, most of the experience was my choice. I chose to stick it out because I did love her and to be very honest, didn't want to fail at another relationship. In saying that, I have come to the realization that it is time to move on and alter my destiny.

I need to have a good time! Been a very long while. Secondly...believe that I am worthy and loved and thirdly, find someone who truly suits me. I am not saying anything negative about Trish but the relationship didn't need to be so difficult and painful but because as individuals,we communicated our hearts differently, that we were not grounded in ourselves and unable to find a common ground of peace, played a role in our eventual separation.

When Trish said she just couldn't be there for me, that she wanted her freedom and in truth didn't trust me anymore. Not only did I understand but I truly let it go. No more anxiety, pain and doubt. I felt relief for the first time because I knew it wasnt meant to be. Finally I understood what the universe has in store for me and it wasn't this.

If I want true love I have to find it within me. Then....find someone that is connected to me not only through passion but through all that brings you to your real love that mirrors your love, then....I will be where I should be.

In the meantime, keep working towards love and compassion. I do still love you Trish but its over and its time to say goodbye to the past. xxoo